Sunday, May 20, 2012

Roller Coaster

Life is a roller coaster ride, not just in a one dimensional sort of way but from every perspective, ranging from the emotional to the physical. Although its always suggested to focus on the positive, and appreciate the wonderfully weird ride which is a 'gift', sometimes the journey through the lower realms of darkness can play havoc to the senses, lulling them into a pseudo calmness which is actually apathy. The pseudo calmness results from the mirage that time stands still whilst in reality life goes on and as your roller coaster drags on, you just feel as if you are falling, further and further down into an endless abyss yet it doesn't frighten you because you have already succumbed to apathy.

Though I desperately grabbed onto the ropes of hope to maintain my sanity during the difficult episodes of last year including my mother's demise, I am human after all and sometimes one gets so tired of holding those ropes, yielding instead to the pain from the blisters in ones hands from the friction between gravity and salvation. Yielding, and letting go, falling in to oblivion or so you hope though the memories fall with you.

God is kind making happiness a relative concept so this too shall pass. Till the mean time, one can just continue with the roller coaster ride and continue doing things they love such as writing and blogging. InshAllah (God willing) I shall make a deliberate effort to be more regular in my posts from now on. Everyone is on their own wild roller coaster ride which are all different but eventually at the end of darkness there is light (or so we hope) if we take care to hold on during the bumpy parts.

Music is a medium that portrays emotions very well. This is an old song by DJ Tiesto called 'Close to you' that explains the apathy feeling and is a really good listen too.

'I wouldn't call it time well spent,
Repeating to myself again,
Find comfort in an endless stream of moments.
I don't even care, about the way I feel today,
Because it changes anyway,
Something will make me cry or smile,
Another picture on my pile...'

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