Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Unconditional Love

Relationships are built on compassion, love and compromise. Compromise because there are always differences, and a mutual understanding is pertinent to hold the bridge together. However they are also built on acceptance of who the individual is, without forcing them to change their true identity. To accept one for themselves, not to change them for something we would rather want them to be. That is what true relationships stand for, love and acceptance of someone the way they are. Without stifling their personality or forcing them to do one thing when they want to do another. And it is these relationships which are the truest, and most precious. They involve an element of trust and love which is difficult to find otherwise. They do not care what the majority of the people may think as long as the individual feels he or she is doing something they believe is right.

Mothers are usually someone who have this kind of relationships with their children. They accept you for who you are, love you for being yourself. If they disapprove of something, you automatically don’t do it or you reason with them, but they never force you to change your identity. Even if you do something wrong, or say things you didn’t mean when you’re angry, you know everything is going to be fine because your mother loves you unconditionally and can never be angry too long.

Ever since my mother passed away, despite having close family members and good friends, I have sometimes lapsed into this feeling of loneliness. One can only realize the value of a mother when she is no longer there. A mother is the only person who would love you unconditionally. And unconditional love is a source of moral support to our existence that is incomparable in this life time,

Life is a risk. However, knowing that you are taking risks when you have the support of a mother is actually riskless if you ask me. Regardless of the outcome, the unconditional love would always be there, and nothing is more precious and more valuable. It is sad how our values are so skewed towards the materialistic side that we fail to appreciate these free blessings.

Mothers also encourage individuality in a person. I had always been encouraged to express my true self. I believe we are all artists, and we all have ways of expressing ourselves in this world. I do it through my writing. However because life is a multifaceted prism, it has many dimensions. We can express our individuality through the use of the colors we chose, the way we dress, the way we present ourselves and the way we treat others.

Dressing up and colors of choice are something very personal to a human being. I believe I can be very expressive through the way I dress. I remember in college when I was going through a dark phase, or would not be in the most cheerful moods, I would dress up quite gothic, heavy black eyeliner, black nail polish and full black attire. When serene, I would wear light colors like white. When feeling fresh and happy, I’d wear colors like turquoise and sometimes bright pink. And when feeling myself, I’d wear Red.
This is something which I did not realize consciously before but I appreciate now very much in my mother. She had always encouraged me to wear my favorite colors, or colors which I liked. When I was younger, I would like yellow and she would get the prettiest clothes for me in yellow. When I liked blue, she would always encourage me to wear blue. When I liked red, she would buy beautiful outfits in red for me. I always loved her choice but on the one two occasions that I thought the suits were not something I’d wear, she would never enforce them on me and instead take me shopping for something I’d like. I wish I could thank her for loving me the way I am and trusting me enough to do what I want to. In return I always did my best to live up to her love and never break her trust.

All the good traits that I have in my personality today are because of my mother. From the unconditional love she showed while nurturing my soul, my personality, my identity. The more days that pass without her, the more I realize just how valuable a mother is. Her birthday is coming up in 22nd April. I would end this note with a virtual birthday note to my mom in heaven:

Happy birthday Mama. You are unconditionally loved. From your only daughter, Amna.


  1. very sweet. and yeah, i think most of our good traits do come from our moms!